The truth sure hurt.

Someone post this on weibo:

今天跟妈妈聊天的时候，问妈妈当初为什么反对我追星，妈妈只说了一句让我差点哭出来。 她说：我怕你那么努力去爱一个人，到最后哭着跟我说，妈妈他和别人结婚了。”

Trans by Malaysian ELF (Adibah):-

Today, I had a conversation with my mom and asked her why mom doesnt like me to love/chasing those idols. Mom only said a sentence that nearly make me cry. She said “I’m scared if you love them like crazily, at the end you come to me and said “Mom, he/she married with other person alrdy”

Trans Eunhyuk's solo

@allrisesilver:

팔다리 묶인 채 비명을 토해내
진실은 숨긴 채 차가운 거짓말도 익숙해
소름끼치는 미소로 일관해
착한척 코스프레 뭘 더이상 말하고 싶지않아 숙이고 침묵해
모두가 죽었던가 쓰레기말고 거짓이 되라는 말을 듣는 나도 어차피 가식
한결같던 꿈까지 다 망가트리고선 무슨 초심 변한건 니들이면서 도대체 나한테 뭘 더 바라는지

의식, 침묵에 지고 진흙에 꽃이 피고 
어둠에 불을 켜고 걷고있어 어깬 펴고 절대 지지않아 더 밀어 봐라 여긴 미로아냐 mirror 더러운 손들을 치워 
니 마지막 자리는 키보드위 내 등뒤엔 날믿는 친구들이
평생을 그렇게 살아봐 처절한 핑계는 아무도 관심없지
뭘 그리 뚫어져라 쳐다봐 불쌍해! 그런다고 여기서 내가 나가나봐 
거기 숨어서 계속해서 미친듯이 짖어봐! 내 길을 걸을테니 꽁무니나 따라와라 
어디까지 가는지나 두눈으로 똑똑히봐 
팔다리 묶인채 비명을 토해내 진실은 숨긴채 차가운 거짓말도 익숙해...

Trans @allrisesilver:
With arms and legs tied, I cough up a scream. With the truth hidden, even cold lies are familiar. All with the same chilling smiles, pretending to be kind cosplay. Don't want to say anything anymore. Bow and stay silent.Were everyone dead? I, listening to words like 'don't become trash, become a lie', am also fake. (You) destroyed what used to be an unchanging dream, but what? The one who's changed is you guys, what more do you want from me. Being aware, losing to the silence; a flower bloom in the mud; Turned on the light in the darkness and I'm walking with my shoulders straight. I won't ever lose. Try pushing me more. This isn't a maze, mirror. Put away those dirty hands. Your last place is on the keyboard; behind my back are friends who trust me. Try living like that forever. Nobody cares about desperate excuses. Why do you look at me so hard like that? Pitiful! Watch and see if I get out of here (because of you). Keep hiding there and continue to bark like crazy! I will walk my path, just follow my tail. See clearly with (your) two eyes how far I go. With arms and legs tied, I cough up a scream. With the truth hidden, even cold lies are familiar...

Cr : @NKsubs

Trans Oh Pitaya's message

Translation: Oh Pitaya (OPTY)'s message/stand about this whole issue

Message: I’ve been thinking of what to say, but I was at the custom for the whole afternoon and I didn’t have my computer with me, thus I didn’t say anything up till now. 

Everybody has been asking me how I feel about this issue, actually, I’m just like everyone else. I am not a very rational nor tolerant person. People who knows me personally knows that I am someone that likes to get to the bottom of everything and I am still like this. Up till now, I cannot accept this and I also do not wish to pretend that I’ve accepted this. I’m sorry I cannot pretend as if nothing happened just to deceive myself. 

After Sungmin had release his official statement on his blog, I realised that this situation can no longer be salvaged. To be honest, I’m feeling upset and unjustified, and it is not because of “my idol getting married”. Doesn’t matter if you believe, I’m different from most of you, I am 26 years old this year, an age where my family will force me to go on blind dates, hence I can understand how he wants to get married and put an end to the single life, it’s just that it isn’t easy to get over things like this. When I say I hate you for not putting yourself in our shoes, I am the one that’s hurting the most. Why can’t I just generously wish you happiness? Why can’t I just generously hand you over to her, telling her this is our precious Sungmin, asking her to treat you well for the rest of her life? Hence as I am feeling disappointed, I feel sorry for not being able to get over it. It’s not entirely your fault, we can only blame you for not handling it well, and blame myself for not being able to let go. 

I once read a story when I was young. It was able two mothers fighting for a child. The judge allowed them to fight for the child, whoever is able to get hold (literally, physically) of the child will get the custody of the child. But once the child felt the pain through the pain from the pulling and snatching, the child cried. One of the mothers let go of her hand. Thus the child gave the custody of the child to the mother who let go of her hand because, if you truly love somebody, you will not bear to hurt him. Hence the one who loves the most, will let go first. Therefore, Lee Sungmin, look, although I cannot understand, I will compromise. At least, in the future, I can proudly say that at the time when I was the maddest at you, when I cannot understand you the most, at your saddest moment in life, when you’re being doubt by everybody, I was by your side. I know I will not regret this decision. 

After so much ranting, Oh Pitaya (OPTY)’s stand is that we will not be affected because of Sungmin’s marriage. We will carry on going for events and everything will stay the same. As long as Super Junior is still around, OPTY will be around. At the same time, I hope that Sungmin’s decisions will be right and that he will be happy and blessed. 

Lastly, I’m sorry for not being able to give my blessing for the two of you, but I believe, that being there for you is the best way to convey (confess) my love for you.

Translation by: @Hyerin_57

141014 Sungmin blog update trans

Title: To.
Message: To. Everyone Who Allowed the Current Me to Exist


Hello, this is Sungmin.
What words to say first... I thought of it countless times, even just the first sentence.
I wrote and deleted countless times, and while doing that, I could remember the thankful faces..
and their voices more..
I write this letter with a heavy and cautious heart.
Everyone, I met a good person, and will be getting married on 12/13.
Thinking about you guys who received the news suddenly today, my heart aches.
I wanted to give the news to my precious friend, and those who love me, to E.L.F. first, and was thinking about how to say it and when.. Sorry that you guys learned through it first through the news article.
To be honest, before I passed this news, because of the decision I am making, and with thoughts about those who have been with me till now...
There was a lot of time that I conflicted (within myself) a lot and endured it alone.
Not because I was afraid of my decision, but worried how surprised my thankful people will be when they hear this news that they've never experienced before, worried about how they could be hurt. 
It's a bit late, but with the courage from your big love and trust in me, I announce this news myself.
I really want to say that I am truly thankful to you guys, who watched me- like a shadow-grow up from nobody and cheered me on.
I am really thankful to those who helped me so far, and members and the company who trust my decision and respect it. 
I will continue to work harder from now on, and will become Sungmin-ee who repay your love.

Cr : @NKsubs

LIVSM's message to Sungmin

This essay, I've written for months and edited hundreds of times. The day I publish this, is when you first announce your marriage.

Why did I write such a long eessay.. Because I totally understand how every fan who loves you feels about this statement. It's like a bomb, that will cause explosion to Sungmin fans, SJ fans and even fans of Hallyu. Following this, Sungmin fans will enter the stage of silence. Because when you first announced, I had full confidence in saying I'll be by your side, I believed this won't end up in marriage and that the girl's revealing made you a victim, but in the end I was struck with this. The anger and disappointment I felt came back, and I can't get rid of it. This response may be worse than the impact if you had directly admitted wanting to get married. I know, things can't progress the way we want them too, you definitely didn't know it will end up like this. So I wrote this, to pen down my journey of knowing this for months, hope that I can, for the fans who have entered a patch of darkness have light, hope that even if they still want to leave you, they won't resentfully harm you. When you published relationship news, I posted that I won't say anything about it because it wasn't time for me to say my opinions, but now, it's the time for it.

Many problems in the process will compromise his privacy and the degree of exposure of this situation so I can't say, but generally I definitely, from the day I first found out till now, had no change in my disappointment and pain inside, instead it slowly increased throughout the progress of this situation, especially when he first admitted dating and the whole world could't find him to ask him about it, but came to me instead. Compared to him, I had bigger pressure. Even though they're my own friends, I couldn't breathe a word, meeting my friends who because of not knowing the situation was furious and hurt. I also couldn't explain, so I became more worried that when they find out the marriage, they would be so disappointed in you. Anger can subside, hurt can be comforted, but disappointment is something I cannot help (him) with (doing so).

When I first found out, I personally went to Sungmin to confirm it. Although he was shocked on me knowing, but he honestly admitted. What happens after admitting? I totally didn't prepare what to do afterwards. Lee Sungmin, this decision is selfish and childish. Why did you choose now? Why must it be this person? Why must you marry? Enlisting and marriage, these two things are the most fatal to idols, others try to avoid as much as they can, but you add both together instead? Your actions will have big impact on you. and even on SJ as a whole, did you really think clearly? I used to worry that because of your personality you may secretly enlist quietly, but now I see that I was completely in the wrong direction. What did I come to Korea for? What did I spend all my years of youth doing? Why am I still staying in Korea? At home there's stacks and stacks of stuff I need to send out, what am I doing? Suddenly felt that my left thumb kept having painful pricks, people say all 10 fingers are related to the heart, but when my heart was ripped apart, only my left thumb will hurt along, maybe because I felt too much hurt that makes me not feel pain anymore. so I used another method to remind myself I was genuinely shedding tears, that I really am upset. I couldn't talk to others, really too hard on me, so I called my mother. My mum likes Kyuhyun a lot, these years I chase Sungmin she knows all about it, when I chase overseas she pays all my expenses. After listening to me, she only said that if it's that painful, come home, don't need to study anymore, I also don't need you to come home with certificate, I just want you to be fine. At that time, I really cried like a fool, really really missed my parents so much, thinking of kangkang (dog?) at home thinking of the many who love me.

Second day, with my eyes swollen like peaches, I went to meet Sungmin's mum. I felt that he might have discussed with her the previous day, because such a major issue found out by fans, if I didn't keep it down and said it out, everything will be destroyed. He also guessed that I would look for her. so he told her first. When I reached the shop, I tried to casually indirectly bring it up, but ended up talking about other things. Then she spoke up first, saying "You went to the fansign yesterday right, how was it? So I said, mm, I know about his marriage. She didn't change expression, and smiled as she waited for me to finish talking, so I knew that he must have prepared her already. Then I said everything that happened, including how I found out and that I'm worried and don't understand. She smiled and listened, and talked to me the whole afternoon/ My worries and lack of understanding, she tried hundred times. But under the sky, there's no parent that can win their child; Sungmin's determinance on this, even his parents, members and company couldn't block his way. At first, everyone didn't approve, but talked again and again with parents, members and company, slowly changing their opinions. Now, everyone respects his decision. Remaining problem is the biggest, which is fans. I'm also a fan, he and his parents' straightforwardness is not easy, from the beginning I have no right to say anything about his life. Discuss calmly, want marry just marry, is not something that can't be accepted, I felt disappointment mainly because of suspicious towards the girl. But Sungmin said, among the girls he dated, there's girls who are more luxurious, there's those who are very introverted and quiet, many kinds of girls, but Kim Saeun is very very outgoing, when she talks she is straightforward, although she has rich family background but she never had arrogance of a wealthy girl, when together with her there's no stress only happiness, any hardships after talking to her will disappear, so he feels very comfortable, feels that she is the right one. After hearing, I believe many people, like me, can only choose to be silent. Lee Sungmin this fool, just live happily, just feel blessed and all is fine. 

So I wrote a very long letter to him, it includes saying that although I want to comfort myself, but I who love you for 7 years, words of blessing is too cruel for me to say, I can't do it. Although I really wanted to say, don't marry, but thinking of how many years I've been beside you as a fan, thinking of members' words, but I know that now you're bearing the weight of the whole world, I don't want to add on to it so I decided to be by your side. All these years of being to Korea, all of my life is related to you, I follow you to concerts worldwide, friends are all buddies who chase SJ, I already, I've reached the point I can no longer remove you from my world. I can respect your decision, but now I cannot give both of you my blessing. I'm sincerely hoping you feel happiness every day, so when you're at your most difficult and most stressful time now, I will stay, and when you announce it, I will stand up and stand beside you to protect you. This is my promise. But that aside, what others cannot do, don't expect me to. I don't know what will the future be, but when you enlist I will find my own happiness, I will also marry and have my own life, and when my happiness comes, I will close this site. Hope that then, I can be one of your friends, and after many years sit down and chat happily about the years of difficulty without restriction. As a fan, it's my biggest wish

When he read it, he acknowledged it to me, then at every fansign he will ask what I want him to write and seriously write it, genuinely thank you, my friend. When he wrote every stroke of that, I felt that actually there's many things I have no need to say anymore, it's not that he's unaware, he's just not saying it. Regarding those who want to protect him till the end, he is seriously grateful. Although many things are not the same anymore, but he's still the beautiful him, the one who earns so much money himself but passes all to his mum to look after, although he himself knows he account and password but every month uses pocket money, and occasionally when not enough he will behave like a kid and whine until his mum approves then uses the money. Him who after a few words of praise from sunbaes can be happy until his mouth cannot close for a whole day, him who after getting daesang will shout ASA then bring his family out to an expensive resturant for a meal, him who every morning wakes up to exercise yet unfortunately is still chubby, him who when looking at good food will drool and eyes will brighten, him who often don't draw eyeliner and have failed hairstyle and hence get laughed at by members, him who on the stage shines and give off heat that warms my life.

I, am just a small fan after all.

Between fans and idol, from the beginning it's a one-sided love without reward, when I first chose this LoveInVain name, everyone sayd it's really special, beautiful and realistic. I also said before, because it's Sungmin, I am willing to do one-sided love. Now this sentence has never changed, only that he himself has a new identity, as a fan there are things I can't do like the past anymore. Form now, I won't relentlessly chase him overseas as much anymore, even on his schedules I won't always attend, but activities-wise I will still try my best to go, I will still help, like I said, my life already has a new page, regarding my contributions to Sungmin and my own life management have found a balance. LoveInVain will still be here, I will still do the usual, I promised him to stand by him I won't eat my words, like what a fan said, blessing their happiness is fake, but blessing his happiness, it's whole-hearted.

Cr : @ryeongbb

Stay Strong Park Jungsoo (Leeteuk)

Many speculation arised.

Reports are everywhere.

Too much heartache to be undertake.

Thus,

No further words are needed.

Stay strong uri leader.

Stay strong Park Jungsoo.

Stay strong Leeteuk.

Just remember, ELF are always there for you.